Tuesday, March 30, 2010

Hello Kitty



#NP Reverse Cowgirl (T.Pain ft. Jeezy)

Excuse meeee, Pussy speakin! So stfu and #siturassdown:

“if you don't like your pussy, who else will?”

Sidenote: Soooo while i was writing this post, my mom called and asked what i was doing. I told her, "writing a blog about masturbation"..and here's how the convo went:
Mom: Hi Miah
Me: Wuddup ma
Mom: What are u doing?
Me: Writing about masturbating
Mom: oh, back to your old ways, huh?
Me: What do you mean? LOL
Mom: You used to touch yourself allll the time.
Me: What the Fuck? When did i start that?
Mom: When you were like one. You would do it in front of everyone, and we would look at you like...What the fuck is she doing?
Me: LMAO, sooo when did i stop?
Mom: YOU NEVER DID!!!!

(OMG I THOUGHT THIS WAS TOOOOO FUNNY!)

(back 2 da shit)....
Leave it to jeezy's voice to put you in the mood, after a long day of work….i know he makes my whole pussy wonder when I get home, and ms. Kitty is looking for attention, crying to me through the seams of my pink victoria’s secret lace panties(boyshorts of course)….as soon as I turn the key in the door, im ready to pull my panties to the side and work my hand through my candy land! (whoop whooooop)!!!!!! #ladies please don't front, you know you all have this feeling sometimes…and miss juicy is here to tell you masturbation is the key to life”!!

#truth about fingering yourself #ladies is that most men love it, its a turn on, and its guaranteed to make him want you even more. (you can even stick your fingers in, taste yo juice, before he has a sip, feeel me???)



Flick the damn bean,

massage the vajj,

tickle the kitty,

polish the pearl!


Everytime I see a bad ass female, or a fine ass dude that looks like he has the biggest dick in the world, I feel the need to clinch my legs, or mentally fuck myself. If you get this feeling, congratulations…you’re mind fucking. Mentally masturbating, teasing the cat, and welcome to the team!

Fingering yourself is not illegal, and I am soooo tired of it being soo taboo! I mean there’s so many different ways u can do it!

Doggy style

Standing up in line at the social security office

Sitting down

Laying down on yo stomach

While your walkin to yo dude house (knowing he has horrible penial)

#ladies just like “there’s no wrong way, to eat a reeses”, there’s no wrong way to stroke your vajj.

#truth about screwing yourself, everyone does it or has done it! and if you DONT do it, something is wrong with you!

#truth about masturbating...ummm..YOU'RE NOT THE ONLY ONE..CHECK IT OUT! DUHH


10 THINGS U OUTTA KNOW (COMPLIMENTS OF ABOUT.COM)

1.Masturbation is not evil, dirty or harmful - it will not make you go blind, drive you insane, turn you in to a pervert, stunt your growth, give you an STD, make you sterile or get you pregnant.
2.Both guys and girls masturbate, it is a normal and healthy part of sexual development.
3.Masturbation is a very personal thing and should not be done in public places or around people who are not willing partners (think safer sex activity).
4.You are normal if you masturbate, normal if you wonder about it but don't do it, and normal if you never give it a second thought and don't do it - it is one of the few things in life that is "normal if you do and normal if you don't".
5.Masturbation may make sexual intercourse more enjoyable because you will already know what it takes to "please you".
6.Masturbation alleviates stress and releases endorphens (the pleasure hormones) in to your system making you more relaxed.
7.Masturbation as exploration of the body is common in children between the ages of 3 and 6, in teens masturbation becomes more sophisticated and sexually motivated.
8.Surveys have shown that 80% of males and 59% of females have masturbated by age 18.
9.Many experts believe that masturbation is more prevalent in the teen years due to a strong fluctuation of hormones; masturbation alleviates the strain of this build up and is a necessary part of development.
10.The only real problems that come with masturbation are psychological and are the result of unhealthy or weary attitudes toward doing it (if you do it but are ashamed) or abnormal practices (for example, public masturbation).

soooo, stroke that clit gurrrrl, dont be scared, make that wet spill through your underwear, who caressss?!!!

Just remember, your pussy is a gift and its your job to open it!"

i think thats enough for now ladies....
toodles!